I feel like I've dipped my toe into the wedding pool only to fall in upto my neck! Although it's a celebration of two people it seems that everyone around wants to get a finger in your pie, so to speak. As a family person I know that family is important for something of this scale to be a success as you need the help! (God knows I can't cook a feast for a load of people and I wouldn't even try!)
However some people seem to not grasp the difference between helping, hindering and taking over. I have already experienced all three since planning our wedding.
Help! Help is when you tell someone you are self catering for 160-200 people and they offer to help cook and prepare food and be in charge :). This is helping because your aware someone has limitations and you want to contribute towards making the dream happen- THANK YOU AUNTY CAROLE- we love you :)
When trying to organise the reception venue i was really worried we were leaving it too late as i've read sometimes people book venues 2 years in advance! So when i arranged an appointment to have a look around the Barn i was excited and worried someone would beat us to the date! The last thing i wanted to hear was someone saying we should 'wait til someone has a wedding there so we can sneak in and have a look at it dressed up' errrm no. That would mean waiting and maybe losing out, it would mean that we would be intruding on someones big day and i wouldn't want that so why would i inflict that on someone else? And we'd be decorating the place differently any way so what would be the point? Answer- There isn't one its just a Hinderance!
And lastly and maybe the most annoying thing i have come across, and to be honest i didn't expect this- MY Mother. I have discussed my vision of what we want from the day from the important things like the food (hehe) to the things we don't think of as that important like the cake!
Please don't panic, we will have a cake and it will look amazing but it will not cost £400+ because when all's said and done it's a bloody cake! Something that is photographed, admired, you have the 'first cut', then it's portioned up for guests to take away in a paper napkin, forgot about for a few days then binned when you find it in your pocket or purse, covered in confetti and fluff!
'Don't worry Jo, i know what it's like to have someone try and force what they think is best on your wedding, On my cake i wanted blue roses but your Nan insisted i get yellow ones!'
At this point i felt alittle easier as she had first hand experience at what i was worried would happen to me.....the she found a local 'Cake Boutique' whose prices start from £395!! After looking at the gallery with her and looking at some pretty bland cakes she saw one where the tiers were made to look like suitcases and she was like a dog with a bone! 'Oh Jo you and Ben should have that one!'
' no mom i don't like it and i certainly do not want to spend that much on a cake!'
Half an hour passed, i wasn't in 'wedding mode' i was watching a movie when she asked again 'So that cake, are you having it then?'
'No, I want to get 4 tiers from M&S for £83 instead, the cake tastes good, it looks nice and it's OUR wedding!' This made me mad as i sounded like a fucking Bridezilla when i don't want to and i thought my Mom someone who should know me so well does not get me at all! and did a total fucking U-turn within an hour! (reminds me of another misjudged cake incident of which i will not get into! Argh! Calm...calm....calm.....and relax.
Much Love, Jo x x x
However some people seem to not grasp the difference between helping, hindering and taking over. I have already experienced all three since planning our wedding.
Help! Help is when you tell someone you are self catering for 160-200 people and they offer to help cook and prepare food and be in charge :). This is helping because your aware someone has limitations and you want to contribute towards making the dream happen- THANK YOU AUNTY CAROLE- we love you :)
When trying to organise the reception venue i was really worried we were leaving it too late as i've read sometimes people book venues 2 years in advance! So when i arranged an appointment to have a look around the Barn i was excited and worried someone would beat us to the date! The last thing i wanted to hear was someone saying we should 'wait til someone has a wedding there so we can sneak in and have a look at it dressed up' errrm no. That would mean waiting and maybe losing out, it would mean that we would be intruding on someones big day and i wouldn't want that so why would i inflict that on someone else? And we'd be decorating the place differently any way so what would be the point? Answer- There isn't one its just a Hinderance!
And lastly and maybe the most annoying thing i have come across, and to be honest i didn't expect this- MY Mother. I have discussed my vision of what we want from the day from the important things like the food (hehe) to the things we don't think of as that important like the cake!
Please don't panic, we will have a cake and it will look amazing but it will not cost £400+ because when all's said and done it's a bloody cake! Something that is photographed, admired, you have the 'first cut', then it's portioned up for guests to take away in a paper napkin, forgot about for a few days then binned when you find it in your pocket or purse, covered in confetti and fluff!
'Don't worry Jo, i know what it's like to have someone try and force what they think is best on your wedding, On my cake i wanted blue roses but your Nan insisted i get yellow ones!'
At this point i felt alittle easier as she had first hand experience at what i was worried would happen to me.....the she found a local 'Cake Boutique' whose prices start from £395!! After looking at the gallery with her and looking at some pretty bland cakes she saw one where the tiers were made to look like suitcases and she was like a dog with a bone! 'Oh Jo you and Ben should have that one!'
' no mom i don't like it and i certainly do not want to spend that much on a cake!'
Half an hour passed, i wasn't in 'wedding mode' i was watching a movie when she asked again 'So that cake, are you having it then?'
'No, I want to get 4 tiers from M&S for £83 instead, the cake tastes good, it looks nice and it's OUR wedding!' This made me mad as i sounded like a fucking Bridezilla when i don't want to and i thought my Mom someone who should know me so well does not get me at all! and did a total fucking U-turn within an hour! (reminds me of another misjudged cake incident of which i will not get into! Argh! Calm...calm....calm.....and relax.
Much Love, Jo x x x
Hello I've just been reading this blog and realised your wedding was yesterday! I hope it all went well and you had a lovely day. Randomly I got married in April with the service at Sheffield Town Hall and the reception at Whiston Manorial Barn (I was googling the barn to see if any pics of our wedding had made it onto their website when I found this blog). I loved the barn, did you go with it in the end?
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